Birthdays, you either love them or hate them.  I've been blessed to be surrounded by so many different types of people I learned very early on that the social norm, was for me to "pick a team"????  What?  Pick a team.  Why?  Heck if I know.  I just knew that birthdays came no matter what "team" I was on.  Ha!  

Naturally, little Ash Marie's butt at (I'm guessing) 4 years old was the center of attention for my birthday party at KIWANA'S PARK in Tempe, Arizona.  Isn't that NUTS that I remember the name of the park???  It's crazy to me how much of this story I actually remember.  In the middle of the party, I was encouraged to go with the big cousins down to the lake where we could feed the ducks.  Back then we were allowed to do that because we didn't know any better.

There I go, the second to youngest grandchild acting like I was too big for my britches hanging out with the COOL kids..............PLOP!!!!!!!! There I went.  Down dropped into the pond, head first, fully emerging into the green pond water.  I can still see the green yucky water at the top while I was under the water.  My oldest cousin, Jenny grabbed me immediately out of the water but by then the ringlets were gone, the party dress was soaking wet, and my little 4-year-old fingernails were filthy with green duck slimy poop...............or *moss from the side of the pond.  That was a birthday party story told to me over and over, growing up.  “Ash, remember that one birthday when you fell in the lake?”............blink. blink…..

As I got older, birthday parties started to take on an entirely new meaning for me.  Yes, the gifts and the cake and ice cream were a bonus; however, something was changing year after year.  Obviously, I was getting older but was I?  I never felt different.  I just remember the closer it got to the party time I got the more and more energy started building up in me.  Sometimes it would get so overwhelming I’d get nauseated from it or the biggest migraine would try and manifest within my head.  It wasn’t until I turned into a young adult that I started to realize it was my body’s way of veiling itself from all the joy and excitement that was about to get unleashed at the birthday party when I was surrounded by all my friends and family.  Haha.  My mother was always so wonderful at celebrating our birthdays.  For that, I am ever so grateful.  She is an amazing mother.  Thank you Mom for always making our birthdays such a special celebration, no matter what age we turned.  Brother and I are lucky to have you.

Recently, I found myself watching a documentary on The Discovery Channel that was explaining the study of trees and it got me thinking.  That is precisely how I envision our birthday month.  The narrator was explaining the connection between the age of trees with the amount of circles on their tree trunks.  Supposedly the amount of rings equals the amount of years the tree was alive.  Right???  You’ve got to have heard this before, huh??  Then about a week later, my therapist and I were talking about birthdays and “battle wounds”.  She then made the analogy of the exact same thing.  The tree rings are a result of that year's adventures and efforts.  At that very moment, I knew that Spirit was trying to get my attention.  But what??  What did trees, tree rings, and my birthday all have in common?  It quickly became one of those things where you obsessively think about it over and over as it eats you up from the inside out.  No???  Is that just me?  Anyway…moving on.

I sat with that thought for a bit, and it honestly took me a while to finally make sense to me. Each ring represents that exact tree's year of life.  Its tree neighbor has one too, although theirs looks different.  Personally, I love different, but my point is that each tree is unique in its own way apart from each other.  Then to zoom in even further, each tree has its own set of rings.  Are all the rings the same in their shared tree??? Hell no their not!!!!  Each year “ring” has its own story.  Just like us.  Just like we do on our birthday.  Ash Marie, the true authentic me, LOVES birthdays of all kinds, for this exact reason.  I look at birthdays as a way to reflect on the completion of my tree ring for that year. 

Yesterday, I turned forty-two years of age.  Forty-two tree rings.  Some rings are thicker than others, and some are so faint that you can barely see the color change.  Which team am I going to choose for this year?  That has yet to be decided……I’m gonna feel ‘er out first, then decide.  Happy Birthday Month!!!!  Blessed Be.

Birthdays are NOT “just another day”.  I have a very close family member who says that every single year.  It hurts.  It hurts my feelings because birthdays aren’t just another day.  In fact, I’d go as far as saying that your birthday is everything.  The time, the place, the month, the year, and the precise moment that we take our very first breath of oxygen means EVERYTHING and it should be celebrated.  That means something to me and that means something to the people who love you.  Even if you find yourself in the darkest places; someone cares.  I CARE!!!!  Message me.  I’ll celebrate with you however and whenever you’d like.  Seriously……….  Stay curious. Stay alive. Stay “young”. Just stay living your most authentic self.  However, the world decides to label you….if you don’t feel like it's a good fit………then change it. 

The ancient Greek philosopher Socrates was known for his deep reflections on matters of life. One such topic he frequently discussed was birthdays. Socrates believed that celebrating birthdays provided an opportunity to reflect on the past and to contemplate the future. He advised people to use their birthday as an opportunity to think back on all they have learned and experienced in life and to look ahead with hope at what lies ahead.  Isn’t this a nice sentiment?  I feel most connected to his perspective on the topic.  It removes all the pressure of “what’s next’.  Sure, it’s important to plan, but this mindset has helped me come to terms with getting older.  Just focus on the things that we did successfully accomplish and what a glorious gift given to us.  Each birthday represents its own little tree ring for the year.  Happiest Birthday to you.  I love you all and I’m sending some of my Birthday Sparkle out to each of you who’ve shared this special time with me.  I’m thoroughly enjoying these Blog Posts and I hope you are too.

“The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate.” — Oprah Winfrey

“I realized it was only me who was stopping myself from living my life.” — Jennifer Aniston

“And in the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.” — Abraham Lincoln